Guard your Thoughts . . . and your Words!

By: Mary Wilkey

Both are things, you know—your thoughts and your words.

It may seem a nearly impossible task to take control of your thoughts, as they seem to run rampant throughout your waking hours.

It’s a matter of changing habit. And although simple, it isn’t exactly easy.

Let me give you an example.

Most of us are totally undisciplined and let our thoughts roam hither and yon, willy-nilly.

During the course of a day, we may find ourselves way back in the past, far into the future, or just overwhelmed with the present. And there seems to be no pattern, just a stream of undirected consciousness floating all over the place.

To change this drifting in uncharted directions, we have to set definite goals. At first, we have to do this hour by hour. And I’ve found a simple kitchen timer is very helpful to discipline oneself.

Get into the habit of setting small goals every hour. For example, within the next hour I’m going to finish this issue. If I don’t, it’s no catastrophe, but it’s something to shoot for; however, I set the timer for 30 minutes, not an hour.

At that point I will get up from my chair, stretch, and do a few little exercises, just to get my blood going, take some deep breaths to get more oxygen into my blood, and then my brain is refreshed and ready to resume.

After that hour is over, stop what you are doing and focus all your attention on changing how you think. This is what prayer is all about—getting results—and to do that you have to spend some time with God, even if it’s only a few minutes.

You have to shut the world out and go within. This is not easy—anything worthwhile never is.

It takes twenty-one days to establish a habit, so you have to exercise your willpower to hang in there. Ask our Lord for His help and strength to get you through to the point that going within to change your thought patterns becomes second nature.

The more time you spend doing this, the sooner it will become a habit, just as regular as your morning grooming ritual.

The more you practice this, you will find that it will become a high point in your day to look forward to with enthusiasm and passion . . . and your level of stress will automatically fall.

The Bible says, ” . . . bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ.” 2 Corinthians 10:5

Just as important as guarding your thoughts is guarding your words.

“Words are like little spiritual containers,” I heard Creflo Dollar say this morning.

Consider the fact that, in the beginning, nothing came into being without having been spoken. Words are everything.

We are to call things that are not as if they are, and doing so will bring manifestation, either instantly or gradually, depending upon your level of belief.

We also will be called to account for all our idle words, as Jesus said in Matthew 12:36-37 — ” . . . every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment. For by your words you shall be justified, and by your words you shall be condemned.”

So never ever speak anything or any condition that you do not wish to see manifest in your life. For example, don’t ever tell a child that he is stupid or that he will never amount to anything.

And never say, “I am afraid that this or that will happen,” for you are creating that very condition and being receptive to it.

Always phrase your statements in a positive tone and expect good results. And t-h-i-n-k before you speak!

About the Author

You may reprint the above article with this info intact:Article penned by Mary Wilkey, publisher of ‘elf Expressions Ezine:

http://elfexpressionsezine.com

To subscribe, email sub@elfexpressionsezine.com?subject=subscribe

(ArticlesBase SC #200518)

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/ – Guard your Thoughts . . . and your Words!

By: Judy H. Wright aka Auntie Artichoke, family relationship coach

Your intention is to motivate a child or employee to do better. You are clear in your mind what you want to achieve and the behavior that you want changed. You expect to be listened to and obeyed! You are right and they are wrong. Someday, they will be grateful that you cared enough to show them what they were doing incorrectly. The only “right way” is “my way.” 

Sound familiar? When a situation calls for feedback, we tend to justify our position and come at the situation from a power standpoint. This tends to put the other person in a defensive status and what may have started out as a visit turns into a confrontation, with words and emotions expressed that are not helpful. 

 Criticism is Hurtful 

 Ridiculing someone is to mock by making fun or dismissing them in a contemptuous way. Sometimes the ridicule may be verbal as in a criticism; “You just can’t get this through your thick head, can you?” The disrespect may be done in a completely non-verbal but powerful way; rolling your eyes, crossing your arms and leaning back, smirking or looking away when the other person is talking. 

 Feedback is Helpful 

 Feedback is intended to provide helpful information for future decisions and development. If you feel that you need to offer pointers on how something should be done, first ask if they would like feedback. If it is offered without judgment or personal attacks, most people will welcome, or at least receive it. 

 Using the old sales jargon, you can sell any idea without making the recipient feel badly. “I know you feel that it was a hard assignment. I have felt that way when I was asked to do something for the first time and I didn’t understand the instructions. However, I found that when I went back and read the instructions or ask for an explanation, it was much easier and I was able to understand what the boss wanted and was able to do it. 

What’s Right, Not What’s Wrong 

 If you want positive behavior with your family, co workers and friends, encourage what is good and downplay what is wrong or unacceptable. When you focus on something, right or wrong, you will get more of it. It is called the Law of Attraction. 

 Verbal vs Non-Verbal Language  

 Verbal or spoken language is the communication of information. Most people only remember about 20% of what is said. Non verbal or body language is the communication of relationships. People look at your facial expressions to see how you really feel about what you are saying and the person you are saying it to. They listen to your tone of voice to gauge how sincere you are. 

If others perceive that you are standing in judgment of them, they will be much less likely to be co-operative and be open to suggestions. When you feel that you must offer feedback, touch them lightly on the back or arm to get their attention, look them in the eye and then ask for permission to share your ideas. 

 Mutual respect is foundation of strong, healthy relationships 

 As you work with your relationships, you will see that criticism and ridicule does not give you the positive results you were hoping for. Respect, encouragment and kind feedback is much more effective at motivating people and projects than criticism and ridicule. 

Never Just One Way To Do Things
Before you jump in with an opinion, perhaps it is best to remember there is never just one way to do anything. Every problem or situation has at least five different ways to get it done. Are you absolutely sure that your way is best? 

 About the Author (c) Judy H. Wright http://www.ArtichokePress.com You have permission to reprint this article in your blog, ezine or offline magazine as long as you keep the content and contact information intact. Thank You. 

Artichoke Press is the home site of Judy H. Wright, family relationship coach and author of over 20 books. If your organization would like to schedule Auntie Artichoke, the storytelling trainer, for a workshop please call 406.549.9813. 

You are also invited to visit our blog at http://www.AskAuntieArtichoke.com for answers and suggestions which will enhance your relationships. You will also find a full listing of free tele-classes and radio shows held each Thursday just for you. 

Thanks for joining our community of caring parents, family members,coaches, teachers and mentors who want to help raise a generation of responsible adults. 

(ArticlesBase SC #750025) 

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/ – Respect Versus Ridicule – Giving Feedback That Builds Up Rather Than Tears Down People 

By: Michael Skye

Some people operate from faith, some from vision. Both are invaluable for tomorrow’s leaders and creators. Learn the distinction between faith and vision, and how you can leverage each.

Craig was a visionary entrepreneur with such a grand vision that people around him typically deferred to him. He seemed to be able to see so clearly what many people could not. And, indeed, he did see what they could not.

To those who could not see what he saw, he appeared daring and bold, often venturing into new and seemingly dangerous territory without hesitation. Some people attributed it to faith, assuming he must have greater faith that they had. Those who joined him on projects usually followed his lead, and often without question. When frightened, they simply hoped things would work out and often admonished each other to “have faith.”

Craig couldn’t understand why they couldn’t see what he could see, even when he tried to show them. Soon, he found himself telling people who couldn’t see what he saw to just have faith in him.

His visionary projects grew in size, and without vision, many people working with him often lost sight of the vision. They’d experience setbacks and failure and start to lose confidence. This increased tensions between Craig and many of the people he counted on. Soon, he began asserting more of an authoritarian demeanor, using fear to motivate people when they lacked confidence in him.

Over the months and years, Craig learned to cut people off, at the first sign that they did not trust him. His story became one of him against the world. He grew increasingly bitter, tired, frustrated and angry. As he formed more conclusions about people and the world, his vision grew less and less powerful. He could not see himself working powerfully with teams of people or accomplishing anything great that required a team effort.

Once a great young visionary, Craig devolved into more and more of a hardened positionary. After many lonely years, Craig found religion, and did his best to surrender his position and just trust in God. He became a man of faith. Using this strategy, he once again became a man who people trusted, a leader people were inspired to follow.

KEY POINTS:

1 – Many people collapse vision with faith. When people see vision and thus feel confident, they often say they have faith. However, there is a distinction between having confidence in the face of the unknown with vision and choosing to have confidence in the face of the unknown without vision.

2 – Both vision and faith are powerful and useful. Whereas many people without vision can only resort to faith when confronted with the unknown, a skilled visionary can intentionally manifest a powerful vision. The man in the example did not have this skill.

3 – Vision can be a force multiplier for anyone’s faith. As a leader it is advantageous to be able to share your vision with others in a way that has them see it, so you need not rely on asking people to blindly trust you or have faith.

VISIONARY ADVANTAGE:

A skilled visionary heads boldly into the unknown and can easily inspire others to join him. Such a person can, even after failing time after time, inspire others to keep going forward. His vision and theirs only grows stronger over time.

VISIONARY DYNAMIC:

The more you operate at the level of vision, the greater your faith becomes AND the less you need to rely on “having faith.”

VISIONARY CHALLANGE:

Look to areas of your life where you have come to think you just need more faith in yourselves, others, humanity, etc. Consider that if you had a powerful vision in these areas, it would only multiply your confidence and your faith. Then do the work it takes to build that vision. (You’re not taught very powerful methods for doing this at home, at school, at church or even through most self-development programs. Such methods are, however, taught inside Vision Force programs such as our boot camp). 

About the Author

Michael Skye, founder and CEO of VisionForce.com, works with a new breed of impassioned change agents around the world, who are giving their lives to stand for all of humanity. The Visionary Mind Shifts are available free at http://www.VisionForce.com/course.

(ArticlesBase SC #118069)

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/ – Faith Vs. Vision

Read more: http://www.articlesbase.com/entrepreneurship-articles/faith-vs-vision-118069.html#ixzz0pcAee0kL Under Creative Commons License: Attribution

The Power of Absolute Honesty in Spiritual Growth

By: Anmol Mehta

We all know the value of meditation, yoga and self-study in one’s spiritual growth, but, we often overlook some of the other more ordinary disciplines that can prove to be equally valuable in this profound journey. Of these many disciplines that are helpful to your spiritual evolution, the power of honesty should not be underestimated.

Honesty is certainly a good value to cultivate and have. No doubt about that, but, in the context of your progress on the spiritual path, the real significance of honesty starts to shine through. Here are the 4 key reasons why honesty can be your best friend on the road to enlightenment.

1. Face Your Weaknesses:

We all have weaknesses and short comings. No one is exempt from this reality. If you are born and going about existence, then you have some aspects that need work. Honesty is going to make sure you face up to these weaknesses, so that you can take the necessary steps to overcome them.

Spiritual work can often be derailed by your shortcomings. The diseases of procrastination, laziness, narrow mindedness, etc., can all easily disrupt and hinder your spiritual growth. The first step in combating these conditions, is to be honest enough to admit you are afflicted by them. Only then does it become possible to try to change.

2. Face Reality:

How is your life really? Not the image you so badly want to present to others, but the actual state of your life and relationships? You see, if all was great and we were full of bliss, love and wisdom, there would be no need for any evolution. Only facing up to the sorry state of affairs honestly, awakens one to the great need for transformation. Without this courage to see how messy things are, no clean up would be initiated. Honesty is the instrument to help us look at this naked truth.

3. Drop False Personalities:

Now we are starting to get into the deeper layers of how honesty actually helps us gather our energies, so that they may be applied towards our greater destiny.

If you watch your ego in action carefully, you will notice that you spend enormous amounts of energy building and sustaining false images of yourself. Prior to engaging in a discussion, you will see yourself often rehearse the dialogue mentally, to make sure you represent yourself in a particular way, regardless of whether that is really you or not. In similar fashion, past events you will see yourself rehash, to feel secure about how you were portrayed, and finally, you will constantly catch yourself trying to manipulate reality in the present so that you are perceived in a particular way. All this image oriented thinking is a colossal waste of time and energy.

The answer to preventing all this waste of energy is simple, just be absolutely honest. You are done then. You will speak as will speak, you have spoken as you have spoken and you are behaving just exactly how your are. Just be sincere and forthright.

Don’t underestimate what has just been conveyed. If you spend some time just watching yourself go through the day, you will be amazed how dishonest you really are. Instead, as mentioned, just be yourself exactly. Don’t, for the sake of impression, put up any false face. Once you realize and implement this simple point, you will be blessed with great freedom.

4. Honesty In Meditation:

Finally, we come to the role that honesty plays in your actual meditation practice itself. When you sit down to meditate, and start to watch your thoughts, you will realize how deceptive the mind is. The false reasons and justifications that the mind creates are alarming. To stop it from continuing it’s mischief, you will have to decide to be absolutely and completely honest and forthright. Without this attitude of honesty, you will not be able to make much progress in self-study, which is the key to spiritual growth and finally enlightenment.

Summary:

The need for honesty and sincerity cannot be over-emphasized. In the early stages it is recommended, to break the habit of unconscious lying and self-deception, that even white lies and diplomacy ought to be abandoned and complete forthrightness be embraced. Once accomplished, simple honesty will go a long way to helping you evolve to your highest spiritual potential.   

About the Author  

Anmol Mehta is a Yoga, Meditation & Zen Expert. His site, Free Beginner Meditation Techniques & Kundalini Yoga Video Instruction, offers 4 Key Laws for Manifesting Desires. Find lively discussions on the Free Guided Meditation Practice, Kundalini Yoga Instruction & Insight Meditation Blog.  

(ArticlesBase SC #288431)  

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/ – The Power of Absolute Honesty in Spiritual Growth  

Read more: http://www.articlesbase.com/motivational-articles/the-power-of-absolute-honesty-in-spiritual-growth-288431.html#ixzz0lwGlzgsj
Under Creative Commons License: Attribution

Going  the Extra Mile,  By: Chip Eichelberger

I was flying back from a speaking at a convention for a client and I sat near the entrance. I watched as the flight attendant reached into a drawer in the galley and handed “wings” in a plastic bag to the children as they boarded. She showed little emotion, didn’t speak, and didn’t even offer a smile. I noticed the parents unwrapping the wings as they went to their seats.

I watched this happen multiple times and I thought that is not a great experience for either the flight attendant or the children. I thought there must be a better way to do that with more impact! Have you ever seen poor customer service and just had to say something? Now, how do you share it without looking like to big of jerk? I used my best rapport skills to ask a few questions and to get the ball rolling. I then said, “I know that you have many tasks you have do to over and over as a flight attendant. I couldn’t help but notice the way you handed out the wings those future frequent flyers. I think the value the kids place on receiving the wings is based on what you say, how you say it and the experience created in that moment. While that might get to be routine for you, I noticed that you just placed the wings in their hands without saying anything.” She looked at me and said with little emotion; “It’s the thought that counts.” I was shocked!

I guarantee that is not the way she was taught to do it during training. I really believe she has an opportunity to positively impact that child forever, impact that future frequent flyer to think good thoughts about the airline if she does it right. I tried to discuss it with her, but could not get through. I did not drink anything unopened the entire flight.

Some people say, “It’s the thought that counts.” – that is just an excuse, when they really are giving a poor effort and are too lazy to do any better. Are you amazed like I am at “who” they answer the phone at many businesses? You are turned off in the first 7 seconds of contacting that company. Sadly many will succumb to the Law of Familiarity: The more you are around something or someone, the more you take it or them for granted.

Through repeated exposure to a task, a job, or a person, you can lose your fire and passion for what you are doing. The tendency is to focus on what you don’t like instead of what you do like, enjoy, or admire about the task, your job, or the other person. This jaded attitude can happen to anyone, and apparently it happened with this flight attendant. It would be a challenge to connect and cheerfully say hello/goodbye to hundreds of people everyday, but it is part of their job!

Where have you stopped giving your best effort with your family or in your career? What are you taking for granted? Where have you let yourself off the hook by saying, “It is the thought that counts”? Does this happen with your customers, your teammates, your spouse or your children?

On another flight a few months later, I happened to sit next to a woman who was in charge of training the flight attendants for this airline. She loved my story, saying she would use it as a “how not to” example. She explained, “I consistently preach to the new flight attendants that good is not good enough. To deliver exceptional service, you have to go the extra-mile.” It does take more than a thought to count and to truly have a lasting impact on others. How can you go the extra-mile to provide a better experience for others today? Remember that your family is in that group too!

About the Author

Chip Eichelberger is a peak performance strategist and motivational dynamo. Former Tony Robbins international point-man, he speaks at conventions for clients like Tommy Hilfiger, ADP, Century 21 and Marriott. Sign up for his e-newsletter at GetSwitchedOn.com – 866-224-1393 – Chip@GetSwitchedOn.com

(ArticlesBase SC #9609)

Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/ – Going the Extra-Mile

Every boss can’t be loved by every employee. But that doesn’t mean that every boss needs to be Michael Scott from NBC’s The Office. Thus, in order to minimize resentment, a good boss should understand some of more common reasons why employers hate their bosses so they can respond swiftly and effectively.

1. Employees need respect. One of greatest complaints that nearly every employee has about their boss is a perceived lack of respect. Most employees feel their bosses don’t respect their privacy, their ability, and their personal lives (yes, employees have a life outside of work). As such, employers should go out of their way to show respect to each employee in the organization. Remember that respect tends to be reciprocated; as such, showing respect to employees is one of the most effective ways to win their respect and loyalty.

2. Employees dislike micromanagers and under-managers. A bad boss is like an overbearing parent. A good boss, by contrast, treats employers like adults – that means giving employees plenty of space and freedom to accomplish their work. Bosses should never spy and should strive to maintain privacy. In short: if your employees are good workers, don’t micromanage. Just step back and let them do their thing. However, be careful to avoid the opposite of micromanagement – under-management. Under-managed employees receive little or no support (material, emotional, financial) from their bosses. While the lesser of two evils, inadequate support also leads to resentment as well as apathy on the part of employees. After all, if the boss doesn’t care, why should I?

3. Employees, like bosses, don’t think they’re getting paid enough. Rare indeed are the organizations in which employees feel they’re well paid. (It’s probably human nature to feel under-appreciated.) Still, a good boss can help placate disgruntled workers by making the pay philosophy of the company clear and by finding other ways to compensate workers.

4. Employees tend to dislike meetings as a rule. Meetings are a necessary evil. That being said, employers can make them less annoying and less intrusive by planning meetings carefully, imposing strict time limits, making goals and action items clear, and by creating an environment where employees can voice their opinions openly without fear of retribution. It might even be helpful on occasions to seek feedback from employees as to how meetings could be made more effective.

5. Employees need to feel appreciated. When creativity or hard work is unappreciated, unacknowledged, or unrewarded, employees – just like everyone else – tend to feel resentment. In turn, resentment can lead to apathy. This is why it is crucial for bosses and managers to show they both see and appreciate the work being done. A little acknowledgment goes a long way – in fact, verbal affirmation can often be as rewarding for employees as a raise or a promotion. Well, almost.

To conclude, let me observe that most of the reasons that employees hate their bosses are not related to background, personality quirks, or other things beyond a boss’s control. Rather, most – if not all – of these concerns could be assuaged if the boss would simply be aware of them and take steps to reduce their occurrence. Of course, that’s easier said than done, mostly because there are a myriad of ways that employees annoy their bosses – but that’s the subject for another day.

 Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/ – Top 5 Reasons Why Employees Hate Their Bosses (And What Bosses Can Do About It)

The Purpose Driven® Life: What on Earth Am I Here For?

By Rick Warren

The Purpose Driven® Life. With over 20 million copies sold worldwide, Rick Warren’s #1 New York Times bestseller guides you on a personal forty-day spiritual journey of discovery in search of answers to life’s most important question: What on earth am I here for? Five biblical answers will transform your outlook on life.

Get Your Copy Here Right Now!

What is an abundant life? An abundant life is one where you attract and are surrounded by meaningful relationships, good health, wealth and especially Joy. Many people confuse abundance with merely meaning money or financial means. While money and finances are a very important part of an abundant life, they are not the most important part. An abundant life is far beyond money and material things. It is an immense feeling of joy and happiness. It is a meaningful intimate relationship. It is a healthy body that is in alignment with your spirit thus, creating a solid foundation so that the other two areas of your life may flourish.

The first step to living an abundant life is to be truly grateful. Be genuinely thankful for all that you have. Make a list each week of all of the things you are thankful for. They don’t have to be big things. Just write down all of the small things that you are thankful for. Go over your list often. Start focusing on the things that bring you a feeling of joy and gratitude. This will help to break any recurring negative thought patterns. You experience in life what you think about the most. Whatever you think about or thank about you will bring about in life.

The next step is to bring your body into alignment. An unhealthy body cannot find peace and joy within itself. An unhealthy body is the result of years of negative thinking. It is the selfish act of constantly telling yourself that, “I want it,” I want it now,” and “I deserve it.” Begin practicing honesty with yourself. Say what you mean, and mean what you say. You must begin daily by finding compelling reasons to be healthy. Perhaps, it is to live long enough to see your grandchildren graduate high school. Or maybe, it is to hang around long enough to play in the PGA or LPGA senior tour. Whatever your reason, you must have a compelling reason. Find your reason, the one reason that stirs your soul, and creates an inferno of passion inside of you. Begin each day by mentally feeling healthy and then continue your days engaging in healthy activities. Set your goals high and then exceed them! You will achieve the abundant health you desire in no time.

The last step is the most important. You must give to receive. If you truly want to experience abundance you must give away first, that which you wish to receive. If you do not believe this, then let’s try a little experiment. Spend ten or twenty minutes just walking around a public place such as a shopping mall. Count to yourself how many people smile at you as you walk by them. Then spend another twenty minutes walking around that same public place and smile at everyone you pass. As you do this, count to yourself how many smiles you get back. This is true for anything in life; especially with your finances. Where you spend your time and money is where your heart will be.

What is your heart focused on? Is it material items and instant gratification, or is it in helping others to have just a little of what you have been blessed with? You must be a good steward with your money doing a service to your fellow man whenever possible. When you break your chains with money you are truly free. It has no power over you. It becomes a tool which then may be used for the betterment of the human condition.

Abundant living isn’t just about the best life has to offer, it’s about dreams made real by the thoughts and ideas that you hold in your head each day. Take some time to explore these ideas while watching them become a reality of living in abundance and discover how amazing and prosperous your life can be!